Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Only in Vegas...a WNTNYB Christmas Gift

Oh I wish I'd had my camera with me...so I'm in Vegas with the family for the holidays. I took my daughter to get some hot chocolate earlier this afternoon. Inside the coffee shop they had a whole wall of holiday pictures colored by kids. My daughter of course ran over to look and then I saw them...all the kids had written their names on the pics and two names that immediately caught my attention...

Zen and Ubiquity

I'll admit while not a favorite word name choice of mine, I've seen the first one before. The second one just confuzzled me...I don't know whether to shake mom's hand, shake my head or kick her in the knee caps for that one.


1. the state or capacity of being everywhere, esp. at the same time; omnipresence: the ubiquity of magical beliefs.
2. (initial capital letter) Theology. the omnipresence of God or Christ.

Monday, December 14, 2009

I predict the new hot name will be Nostradamus

Ok...this is killing me...

So the name gurus Satran and Rosenkrantz have decided that now they can tell the future. They have predicted the top baby names of 2019


Their top picks include:

Ava, Amelia, Violet, Ruby and Ella for girls and Ethan, Aidan, Milo, Cash and River

The thing is...um...if I am not mistaken all of these names are currently in the top 100-200 most popular...so um... yeah. 10 years from now, Cash will be in the top 10. Given the current state of the economy, nothing would surprise me and suppose numbers 2, 3 and 4 will be Money, Recession (for girls) and Forclosure.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Why I Busted Out Laughing...at the Library

I went by the public library today to research some of the names that are going in to the WNTNYB book.

I came across a few pretty good books. One source book in particular had a lot of really good names in it...I couldn't even complain until I came across this one:


If you know anything about me...I have a crazy frame of reference for things. I saw the name and immediately---thought of the following song... and busted out laughing in the middle of the library. Shhhh! ROTFL

For those unfamiliar with the song fast forward to about 3:11 and pay attention to the lyrics. SMH

Wednesday, December 2, 2009


Utah Baby Namer has been around for awhile and I never fail to find some amazingingly hideous baby names. Kudos to them!

I love this site, because nothing screams "I'm a Mormon" like naming your child any of the following:

Allora LaLovi
Azer Baloo
Confederat America
Daxson Ekewaka
Denim Levi
Friends Forsaken
Helamans Warrior
Honey Baretta
Thankful Flood
Welcome Exile

Thursday, November 19, 2009

All the Cool Kids Are Doing It Part III

What I should've titled this post is "Yet ONE MORE reason why I really need to hurry up and get the WNTNYB book FINISHED"

Once again... these two gurus of baby names have managed to smash together some conglomerate of names that are a certified mess and call them "cool"



Please I beg you...make it stop.

(so I'm told this was a character in High School Musical. It's also with a slight variation in spelling...a breed of DOG!!!!)
Drusilla (this is the evil step-sister from Cinderella...um...NO)
(yes, it made me LAUGH)
(for REAL???)
(sounds like exotic fish)

and my new favorite horror (and I will BET the .38 in my bank account--don't judge...lol, that at least one of you thinks of the EXACT same thing I did...)


Finally...Book Version of WNTNYB?

I'm going to post a new list today, but I wanted to announce here...drumroll please

After numerous requests, reminders, and butt kicking from a few friends...

I'm taking WNTNYB and I'm turning it into a book.

That's right!

The text is done for the most part. I'm pulling some of my favorite blog posts, revamping the name lists and getting it all ready to go...in theory by the end of the year. I figure I've been sitting on it long enough, I've had the blog for just over a year and quite frankly I'm tired of getting yelled at about it. LOL. It's taken me a ton of research but I think I'm finally ready...

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Tales From the Open Mic Part 2

I'm going to post a full list today, but I got yet another interesting name from a poetry spot...

A poet was doing a piece about childhood crushes and mentioned a girl by the name of ...

April January

Yes, that is her actual first and last name. Trust me we all asked. LOL. Actually, the irony is there are 9 months between April and January, but I digress.

So April January wherever you are, there is a poet who remembers you fondly.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Tales from the Open Mic

These are true stories that have happened to me within the past week...

Story #1:

Last week I went to a poetry spot and somehow (don't ask, because the truth is I don't know) the host started talking about bad baby names. I'm paraphrasing here...She said something to the effect of "I have a friend who is a pre-school teacher and she had this cute little girl in her class named Dia...I'm thinking Dia that's different but cute, my friend said that's not her name I just refuse to call her by her FULL name...which is... Chalmydia."

A girl in the audience spoke up and she said "you think that's bad, I work in a NICU and we just had a baby in there name G'noreah (pronounced like Je-nora)"

Story #2:

So last night I went to another open mic poetry reading. While I was standing outside this girl walks by with this little brown baby--I mean so cute I almost swore it was a doll. Absolutely precious little girl with fat cheeks in a little warm suit because it was kinda chilly...you know I had to ask...

Me: "What's her name?"

(I'm sorry I am spelling this by phonetics)

Girl: "O-be-di-ji-ah."

Me: "Say that again"

Girl: "O-be-di-ji-ah."

me thinking to self: wish I had not left my phone at home, feeling the need to blog this immediately.

Smh. And I'm done. Poor precious baby.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

All The Cool Kids Are Doing It...Part II

I couldn't resist...here are some more "supposedly cool" baby names from the "experts." SMH...

Vermillion (!!!...!!!...!!!...??????????????)
Laragh (I believe this to be a horrible misconglomeration that's pronounced like "Laura")
Benajah (blank stare...)
Polexia (a disease which causes people to involuntarily vomit when you tell them your child's name)

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

All the Cool Kids Are Doing It...

The gurus of baby names are Satran & Rosenkrantz. They've written 10 books and collected thousands of names. Every so often I see them cited in baby name blogs hyping the latest in name trends.
Just today as I was scanning, I came across their list of "cool" baby names.

Um...Perhaps I missed the memo, but if this is what constitues "cool" ...

Well, [insert look of complete confuzzlement] I won't commentary I'll just let you decide. Here's a small sample of names that made their "cool" list:


I'll be over at the nerd table if anyone needs me.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

WNTNYB--the Zodiac Edition

Ok... so my birthday just passed. And in honor of that today's post will honor...well let's just call them parents who are really into astrology...lmao

August (born in December)
Gemini (who is a Libra born in Oct.)--actually I've seen this more than once
and last but not least...

September (born in august)

Monday, September 21, 2009

I Feel Like a Bobble Head

Sometimes I find names that just make me shake my head. There's just no other appropriate reaction. I do it so much now I'm beginning to feel like a bobble head.

Some of my more recent SMH finds:

Nye'jaiah (no relation to the above)
Murryea (I'm assuming this is a variation or Mariah)

and two that seem destined to meet someday...

Fire and Diesal

shakes head sadly and walks away

Monday, September 14, 2009

Sexual Inuendo

So WNTNYB is back. After a long summer break. Whew!

More madness, more names and some surprise announcements to come. For now...today's installment.

Bad bad VERY bad and unfortunate name combinations (courtesy of Failblog)Say each out loud for full appreciation...lol

Contestant #1 Myke Hawke

Contestant #2 Jack Goff

Contestant #3 Mike Litoris

Contestant #4 Willie Stroker

And last but not least Contestant #5 meet real estate broker Gaye Males

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Wow...so does he speak wookie?

The official return of WNTNYB was going to be tomorrow, but I saw this just today and just had to share...

a gentlemen in Norway has officially changed his name to

Julius Andreas Gimli Arn MacGyver Chewbacka Highlander Elessar-Jankov

According to the article...
Julius is an homage to the famous chimp at the Kristiansand Zoo
'Arn' is a Swedish knight movie
Elessar and Gimli are from 'Lord of the Rings'
'MacGyver', just the greatest Richard Dean Anderson show ever!
'Highlander' could refer to either the movie or TV show
Chewbacka (aka Chewbacca) is from 'Star Wars'

and that makes this officially the name of a man who will probably never get laid again. The link for the full article is below


Monday, August 17, 2009


WNTNYB was on summer hiatus while I stacked up on new names and did some work...more horrible names to come. I promise. ;)

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Half Baked Parents


So.... Parent of the year award goes to...

A couple in Milwaukee...who, according to the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel (courtesy of mediatakeout.com) named their child...

Marijuana Pepsi Jackson




the jokes here pretty much write themselves. Good night folks!

Friday, May 8, 2009


Today is the day.

Every year just before Mother's Day, the Social Security Administration releases their top baby name list. And guess what? Emily got bumped out of the #1 spot after 12 years!!!

Drumroll please... Top Baby Names for 2008

Some newcomers that also cracked the top 1,000 list according to yahoo! are:

Isla (623), Mareli (718), Milagros (731), Dayami (750) and Nylah (821).

Aaden (343), Chace (655), Marley (764) Kash (779) and Kymani (836). Beckham debuted at 893

On a special note: Happy Mother's Day to all!!!!

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Any Town, USA

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood. If you live in Pleasantville perhaps.

But what if you lived in say Ubly, Michigan or Kickapoo, Texas

I once met someone from the town of Willacoochee, GA and I remember driving through death valley past a town in California called Zyxzz (don't ask me how to pronounce that...lol). Apparently babies aren't the only ones subjected to odd names...so make sure to stop and take a picture the next time you happen to be driving through...

Ah Gwah Ching, MN
Bitahochee, AZ
Bo Bo, IN
Cartoogechaye, NC
Chillicothe, OH (this is where my family is from...lol)
Choccolocco, AL
Ho Ho Kus, NJ
Spreckles, CA
Tonganoxie, KS
Sautee Nacoochee, GA
Zelienople, PA
Pejepscot, ME
Kwigillingok, AK

Monday, April 20, 2009

And what do YOU do for a living?

My name is Danielle Reed and I'm a writer...ironic isn't it...maybe funnier or a shade more fitting if I'd have become a librarian perhaps? D. Reed--Librarian. LOL. I mean I do look the part, with the glasses and all...

What if your name were Hertz or Payne...would it then be fitting to become say accident lawyers or chiropractors perhaps?

I came across an artcle today in the New York Daily News concerning people who have names befittting their professions. For instance Summer Rayne Oakes who happens to be...an environmentalist or Zoe Hamburger who is an account manager for...McDonald's. Click the link to see the entire article.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Facebook vs Batman

Yet another reason why you should watch what you name your kids...

Most of us who are tech savvy use some sort of social networking site to keep up with people. Well if you have an, ahem, unusual name you can forget being "social" at least on Facebook, without a fight.

According to a recent article in the Washington Post people who are stuck with funky first and/or last names such as Batman or Yoda have had their accounts rejected by Facebook. Apparently certain names are flagged so that spammers can't make up FB pages.

Facebook is not intuitive? Go figure!

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

How a Techno-Geek Names a Baby

For all you technology geeks/parents to be...

As if the slog of baby name blogs (WNTNYB not withstanding), mommy message boards, twitter, facebook and ubiquitous baby namer sites were not bad enough, back in February a new iPhone application was developed called "Name Shake"

I watched the demo video (available on the link above). Apparently, how Name Shake works is, a screen which resembles a casino slot machine randomly spins and comes up with a name by sex, country of origin and letter of the alphabet. You can lock any or all of these categories so that for instance you only see French girls' names that start with the letter Q. There are something like 19,000 names in the database that powers the app. It allows you to save your favorites, gives you the meaning of the name and a pronounciation key and you can email your list of favs to your friends and family.

I don't know about you guys, but I don't know how much I want to leave the naming of my children to an iPhone. Um...yeah, call me old fashioned. Especially when I was watching the demo and saw names like:


Yeah well it was a good idea... in theory. Where does it end people? Where does it end? Oh the humanity! Smh

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

March Madness

In my best Dick Vital--It's March Madness BABY!
Ok so I know it is officially April, but here are today's hot picks...

The Sweet 16--- WNTNYB edition. All of the children listed below were born in March.

A'son ( lemme guess he was a BOY)
Banayeasha (officially confuzzled)
Cleveland (who was born in Cincinnati)
Aries (surprisingly enough he actually IS an Aries)
Raekwon (Wu-Tang! Wu-Tang!)

And my official March Madness bad baby name championship pick...


Wednesday, March 25, 2009


So earlier I posted that M.I.A did not in fact name her son Ickett.

In fact her son's actual name is as reported on TMZ...


Oh yeah 'cause that's so much better than we previously thought. *Side eye*

Sunday, March 15, 2009

It's so bouncy and shiny...

Charlie Sheen and his new wife Brooke Mueller had twins boys last week...

It's not the names so much that are bad...but rather the combination. The boys are named Max and Bob

which again...not so bad, until you add the Sheen

then they become Max Sheen and Bob Sheen...

Is it just me, or do you suddenly envision hair care products.

In my best announcer voice: For beautiful, long, silky hair try Panteen Max Sheen and for shorter sleeker looks new Bob Sheen

LMAO. I'm done, time to go wash my hair

Monday, March 9, 2009

Overheard in DC...

There is this great website called DCist that I check out at least weekly. It's basically about all things DC...think, your local online version of the City Paper or the equivalent.

Anyway, they run a column every week called "Overhead in DC" (just FYI, they also do versions of this for other cities such as NYC and LA). Overheard in DC is collection of the stupid things people have literally overheard...I'll admit I've even submitted a few gems. This past week's Overheard was just priceless so I've copied it here:

People's names can be pretty interesting: they can be traditional, they can have some deep meaning, or maybe they're just spelled a certain way to be different. Names can follow trends (how many Jaydens did you know 10 years ago?) or can fade away (Elmer or Agnes?) And there's all those funny names, like Richard Head. But sometimes, they're just terrible.

Overheard of the Week

Riding the Green line between Gallery Place and L'Enfant:

30-ish mother to her two children bouncing all over the place: "Perry Ellis and Elizabeth Claiborne! You two sit down and shut up right now!"

Check out more of last week's Overheard

Friday, March 6, 2009

Rhymes with...

OMG, the celebrity baby names...I want to smack myself upside the head like I need a V-8

This week I have been hit with the triple whammy.

First up Matthew Settle from the tv show 'Gossip Girl' and his wife had a baby girl who they named...


Next up, model Niki Taylor who also gave birth to a baby girl chose...


And last but not least M.I.A. last seen performing at the Grammy Awards ---on her due date no less, has named her son...


Rhymes with the sound you're about to hear right now while you ponder what they were thinking...


UPDATE: Contrary to reports M.I.A did NOT name her son Ickett. **Cue thunderous applause**

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

(Un)cool Britannia

Here's one from you guys...courtesy of K.

It's nice to know Americans aren't the only ones who come up with silly monkiers.

And they say the British have no sense of humor...

Pearl Button
Jo King
Barry Cade
Carrie Oakey
Priti Manek
Tim Burr
Terry Bull
Paige Turner
Mary Christmas
Anna Sasin

Check out more from our neighbors across the pond in BBC News

God save the queen!

Thursday, February 26, 2009


Here we go again with Random Thursday...

I just have to ask the question... WHY?

Champion (somebody has high hopes for this kid!)
Xizallian (used to be from outer space?)

Must've been named after mommy watched a little too much Cartoon Network:


Winner of the I guess they're hoping to do better the next time around award:


Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Mardi Gras

Today marks the tail end of Mardi Gras.

I can't be there. :( So instead I bring you bad bad names related to all that is the gluttony and pagentry of the Big Easy.

Bad first/last combos:

Lent Church
Tuesday Victory
Tuesday Green
Mardi Daume
Orleans Boline
Carnival P. Jones

Just say "N.O.":


Maybe they were in New Orleans in spirit:

Queen Anyza



Thursday, February 19, 2009

No disrespect to the dead but...

Just so you know that this name is not urban legend...

Cannon, Acquanetta*

Family-Placed Death Notice

CANNON, Acquanetta Funeral service for Ms. Acquanetta D. Cannon will be held on Friday, February 20, 2009 at XXXXX Funeral Home at 1:00 PM. 404-XXX-XXXX
Published in The Atlanta Journal-Constitution on 2/19/2009

Just in case you need a reminder of why this is funny...


Thanks Malika for sending me this one.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Starve a Cold, Feed a Fever, Name a Baby

I've been down and out with the flu the last 3 days...so I'm kinda feeling half human today--enough to bring you WNTNYB- Sicko Edition

These are courtesy of an article I came across a few days ago via MSNBC and the Today show.

Fever Bender
Leper Priest
Cholera Priest
Rubella Graves
Typhus Black
Hysteria Johnson
Emma Royd
Kathryn E. Coli
Mumps Sykes

Friday, February 13, 2009

WNTNTB- Friday the 13th Edition

Welcome to the Friday the 13th Edition of what NOT to Name Your Baby.

Usually it's a great day for me...not so lucky for the people walking around with names like:

Lucky Day
Thirteen Foster
Friday Anderson
Talisman T. Hawkins
Tarot Peterson

I've also recently come across kids named:


And just in case you ever wondered how they could keep making Friday the 13th movies... the real Jason Voorhees lives the states of CA, KS, NC, PA, WV, FL, KY and OH

Thursday, February 12, 2009

WNTNYB- Valentine's Day Edition

I decided to do this a bit early because tomorrow I am doing a post in honor of Friday the 13th

Today's feature presentation... people who have the misfortune of having not only been shot in the behind by an angry winged midget, but to have live with probably being teased every year about this time. Here's a Valentine for them*

*note names with first/last combinations were found via anncestry.com

Valentine Love
Valentine Day
Valentine Card
Cupid Hartman
Cupid Hunter
Cupid Kick
Cupid Summons
Heart H. Flower
Diamond Ring

and others I have come across since I started this project:

Blue Moon
Diamond (too many to count)

and my favorite... I once worked as a pre-school teacher. In one of my classes I had a really cute little girl who's name was:


Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Spel Chek

For those of you who have been following this blog for awhile, you might notice that one of the things that drives me absolutely nuts is when mommees tri to git cutsiey and kreeativ with the name spellings. And then have the nerve to get mad and offended when someone butchers their child's name or misspells it.

For example. Today's list of Huked on Fonix offenders:

Y'Marrie (I will bet $ this is either pronounced like Emory or ee-MAUR-ee)
Uhllanna (this is either 'Alana' or 'Ayanna' depending on how you pronounce the double L)
d'Metrique (who are his siblings? d'Miles, d'Kilometers??)

smh. shrugs. goes back to reading Webster's dictionary. knows why we are falling behind other countries in education---we can't even spell our OWN names. sigh.

Monday, February 9, 2009


So crazy super mommy Nadya Suleman was on the Today Show this morning talking about how she was planning to raise all 14 of her kids (with no job and her family turning on her) and how she had plans to go back to school in the fall (yeah, good luck with that!)

In any case she released the names of the kids:

and McCai

Random. Biblical. Madness. Just what the world needs

It's Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat!

Thank you Tiger Woods!

Tiger and the little lady had another cub. Their first was a daughter named Sam. Joining her as the latest addition to the pack is little brother

Charlie Axel

I'm actually kinda liking it...although I can't lie...Axel makes me want to start humming the theme song from Beverly Hills Cop

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Because Names Are Funny.

This comedian has a take on bad names.

The comedian's name ironically is Finesse Mitchell

What's Her Nickname?

The name itself isn't that bad. It's the cree-aa-tive way mommee spelled it

I'll let you write your own jokes for this one.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Outta This World

So Erykah Badu and baby daddy #3 aka Jay Electronica welcomed a little girl on Superbowl Sunday.
Apparently it was a home birth with Jay sending updates via Twitter.

Now joining big brother Seven and sister Puma is...drumroll please...


Yes...Mars like the planet!

Aaaaaaaand I'm done. No comment

Friday, January 30, 2009


I'm sure you guys have heard about the mother in California that gave birth to octuplets. If not there's a link to the story below.

Well guess what...she has 6 (yeah that's right 6...as in S-I-X) other children. All under the age of 8 including a set of 2 year old twins.

Let's see here 6+8= 14

14 KIDS!!!!

And she's a single parent. Not that I am knocking single parenthood. But 14 kids???

I say all that to say I'm curious as to what their names are. If I find out I will post, but in the meantime, let's hold an informal contest... post your answers in the comments...

Currently they are identified as Babies A-H. What do you suggest the octuplets be named?

To see the full article, click here

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Mormon Madness

One of my favorite sites for bad baby names is the Utah Baby Namer. Check it out, it's a lot of fun!

Now I don't know too much about the Mormons or the LDS (Latter Day Saints) Church, but aside from the fact that they have a lot of children and occasionally practice polygamy--apparently they are very fond of prefix names (taking any halfway normal common name and adding an unnecessary prefix such as -La, -Sha, -Le etc.) and what I call "smush" names (taking any combination of two names--usually the parents-- and trying to force them together into some abomination of random madness).

Speaking of...here's a sample of said random madness from UBN's 'best of' list:


Iron Rod
Treasure Cocaine
Mormon Miracles
Evol (love spelled backwards)

The winner of the "are you sure your child was born in Utah and not Seattle" award:


Winners of the "you really ARE from Utah" award:


Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Celebrity names impersonated

I thought I'd change it up a little today.

I was thinking today about why artists, singers, actors etc. change their names.

Answer: Because somehow 50 Cent sounds so much better than Curtis Jackson (*side eye and sarcasm*).

So today I'm going to expose their gubment (yes I said gubment) names. And if the FBI, LAPD, Secret Service, IRS or Arizona State Police (that means YOU DMX) are reading, you didn't get any of this info from me.

Real names of Hip hop and R&B artists:

Ashanti Ashanti Shaquoya Douglas
Busta Rhymes Trevor Tahiem Smith
Chaka Khan Carole Yvette Marie Stevens
Flava Flav William Jonathan Drayton, Jr
Flo Rida Tramar Dillard
The Game Jayceon Terrell Taylor
Juvenile Terius Gray
Lupe Fiasco Wasalu Muhammad Jaco
Plies Algernod Lanier Washington
Remy Ma Reminisce Smith
Vivica Fox Vivica Anjanetta Fox

and the ass backwards award goes to:

Michelle Johnson aka Meshell Ndegeocello

the completely random flashback award goes to: Yourree Dell Harris but you may remember her better as:

Call me now! ROTFL

Friday, January 23, 2009

You KNEW It Was Coming

So last year there was this article on how Barack was about to take a jump as the hot new name for babies...

Click HERE to see the article

And it's not just in the U.S. apparently it's a world wide phenomenon. Thus far I have only come across one Barack, but I suspect when the Social Security name list comes out in May you'll see Malia, Sasha, Michelle and Barack all over it.

Friday, January 16, 2009

In honor of MLK Day and the Inauguration WNTNTB will be on a short hiatus... but I wanted to leave you with this...random abstracts from the class of 09


and my new favorite word name...


I'm crying on the inside. LOL. Have a great weekend.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

As Seen on QVC

First, if you are looking for a unique name, don't choose Unique. It's ironic, but Unique is not, well, unique...and I think I've used that word/name enough times in 2 sentences. Anywho, aside from that one, I have recently come across a spate of names ending in the letters 'que'

I don't know about you, but adding those letters to what might otherwise be a halfway decent name immediately makes me think of the real imitation knock off jewelry they sell on QVC:

So I guess these would be real imitation children's names?



Martinique (umm...this is a COUNTRY!)

smh...folks really need to quit

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Creativity at its finest...

Here's my entry for today, but first an important UPDATE: A few entires back I posted up a story concerning a child named Adolph Hitler. Well, it seems young Adolph and his sister Aryan Nation were taken from their parents and put into foster care. Check it out HERE

And now on to today's names... no list-- just a funny name related video I came across on youtube:

I think (and I will have to take liberties with the spellings) it goes

Deon Jr
and My'ana

Whew- falls on the floor in exhaustion

No words. None. ROTFL

Scarred for Life

Why our children are going to be permanently scarred for life...

Exhibit A:

(signs that we are seriously in the middle of a financial crisis.)
Exhibit B:

(either this is a "smush" name that wasn't well thought out or somebody owns stock in Victoria's Secret)

Monday, January 12, 2009

Pimp My Kid

I'm so tired of people naming their kids after cars. When did this become trendy and why can't we hit the brakes. Next thing you know, the kid will have a custom diaper kit complete with spinners on the pacifier...

Plus I get the feeling some of these kids might be named after their place of conception.

Grande Marquis

and the ubiquitous...

Porsche, Lexus and Mercedes

Friday, January 9, 2009

And we have celeb baby #2 for 2009.

Lisa Bonet (you remember her as Denise Huxtable from the Cosby Show) and her husband Jason Momoa had a baby boy. Now before I comment...he's Hawaiian.

Let's give a warm round of applause and an aloha for:

Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa

If you want to see what it all means check out the article here: Lisa Bonet Welcomes a Baby Boy

I'm going to go do some serious tongue and jaw exercises in the meantime until I can figure out how to pronounce it.

PS. Her other two kids are named Lola and Zoe so why she chose to do that to her son is beyond me. smdh.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Yo Mama (Round 2)

I think I am going to make this a regular feature... yo mama!

Ok the deal is, in most my regular search haunts when you search for baby names they are listed with the names of the mother, father or both depending on the source. That means that sometimes I inadvertantly get 2 or 3 funny names for the list for the price of one. A good majority of the time it's the mothers' names that catch me off guard more than the kids. Mostly because I'm sitting there thinking that in theory these women are between let's say, 17-35 years old, which means they've had 2-3 decades to deal with whatever verbal monstrosity was scribbled onto their birth certificate.

And the funny part is, these are the ones I see most often giving their children the easiest of names. Ah, delicious irony. All I have to say is chile better you than me.

zwani.com myspace graphic comments

Here's a small sample:


Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Way Down Yonder in Mississippi...

There was an interesting article today on yahoo on how Mississippi has replaced New Mexico and Texas as the state with the highest teen birth rate. Check the story out here: Mississippi has highest teen pregnancy rate

And since I have already "messed with Texas" I thought today I would do an ode to Mississippi.

Now I don't know too much about Mississppi, except how to spell it and what I remember from my un-intentional drive across the entire state about 3 years ago. What I did learn is that maaaaaan can they name 'em down there...sheesh! Not only did I find some babies, but I found some mamas with some hot mess atrocious names. I plan to post those in another "yo mama" blog later in the week.

Catfish and confederate flags aside, here is today's naughty list courtesy of our friends in the Magnolia state:


The irony award:

(sadly adding a prefix just made it more of a mess. Le grand *sigh*)

And the winner of the parents had to be World of Warcraft junkies award:


Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Enough Already...

Now a few days ago I posted a blog stating that one of the trends I think should go far far away in 2009 in the whole Jayden/Aiden thing.

Lemme tell you why...

First let me say we have a Jadyn (spelled as such) in my family.

Now, I search for GAT ("good and terrible"...lol) names everyday. And I don't care when the "surveys" say-- on every hosiptal/nursery/birth announcement website I use, in every city, every month of the year I come across at LEAST 5 kids named Jayden. It's turned unisex. It's gotten crazy.
Jada Smith and her son Jayden

Just to show you how overly common it is...it went from being #294 on the Social Security name list in 1999 to #18 in 2007--that effectively should kill it from further consideration.
Now add to that the creative folk who think that just because they spell it "creatively" it's really going to make a difference. [face screwing up into look of bewilderment/confuzzlement]. Um...
Allow me to enlighten you...

Here are some of the various incantations of JAYDEN I have come across:


and...my personal favorite...


Seriously? Can we buy a vowel please?

If I tell you it doesn't make a difference how you spell it, will it make a difference? I suppose not. Ay dios mio, make it stop.

Britany Spears and her son Jayden James

Monday, January 5, 2009

And so it begins...

Well, it could be worse... in my first celebrity baby posting for 2009 Rebecca Romijn and Jerry O'Connell apparently had twin girls named:

Dolly Rebecca Rose and Charlie Tamara Tulip

Ok... not excruciatingly horrid, but what's with the triple naming and the flower references??

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Goodbye 2008

Happy New Year!

Out with the old and in with the new right?

While I am waiting to see what the class of 2009 has in store, here is my unofficial name resolution list.

8 Names/Name Trends That Should Go Out with 2008:

1. Jayden/Aiden and any spelling variation of the the two. Neither one of these names is bad, but if parents think they are being either trendy or original picking either one of these names as soon as their child hits pre-school age they will find they were sorely mistaken.

2. Brooklyn Naming your child after any borough of New York is not a good look. Especially when you've never been, have no affiliation with or live anywhere near NYC. Uggggh!

3. anything ending in 'Asia'- My'asia, Ki-Asia, T'asia, Malaysia-- just ghetto fabulous!

4. names ending in 'ee'- Emilee, Averee, Kailee. I'm sorry, but the double 'e' names always reminds me of some overly amped bubble headed cheerleader/future sorority chick. Like OMG make it stop.

5. random 'Y'- hate this trend with a passion. Why is it so hard to add a vowel somewhere, ANYWHERE? and what's the deal with adding random 'Y's in names that don't need them.

6. dead/aging rock star names- dylan, hendrix, jagger--your child has a better shot as being an accountant, lawyer or a teacher than a rock star, so why burden them with a rock star name. If they really do become rockstars, they'll probably change their names anyway

7. Nevaeh- again, in about 2-4 years you can expect to step into any pre-school or kindergarten class and find about 5-6 little Nevaeh's running around. I'm just waiting to find the kid named Lleh

8. Patience and Honesty. I'm willing to bet they will someday grow up to be strippers or guests on Maury.

Let the weird names begin. Let's see what 2009 has in store...