Friday, January 30, 2009

Sidenote...

I'm sure you guys have heard about the mother in California that gave birth to octuplets. If not there's a link to the story below.

Well guess what...she has 6 (yeah that's right 6...as in S-I-X) other children. All under the age of 8 including a set of 2 year old twins.

Let's see here 6+8= 14

14 KIDS!!!!

And she's a single parent. Not that I am knocking single parenthood. But 14 kids???

I say all that to say I'm curious as to what their names are. If I find out I will post, but in the meantime, let's hold an informal contest... post your answers in the comments...

Currently they are identified as Babies A-H. What do you suggest the octuplets be named?

To see the full article, click here

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Mormon Madness

One of my favorite sites for bad baby names is the Utah Baby Namer. Check it out, it's a lot of fun!

Now I don't know too much about the Mormons or the LDS (Latter Day Saints) Church, but aside from the fact that they have a lot of children and occasionally practice polygamy--apparently they are very fond of prefix names (taking any halfway normal common name and adding an unnecessary prefix such as -La, -Sha, -Le etc.) and what I call "smush" names (taking any combination of two names--usually the parents-- and trying to force them together into some abomination of random madness).

Speaking of...here's a sample of said random madness from UBN's 'best of' list:

Violin
Sonica
Grik
Tchae

Xko
Iron Rod
Treasure Cocaine
Rifle
Gatobon
Mormon Miracles
Junola
Wavie
Hummingbird
Trystal
Young'n
Vindalu
Sterile
Taffilyn
Evol (love spelled backwards)

The winner of the "are you sure your child was born in Utah and not Seattle" award:

Starbuck

Winners of the "you really ARE from Utah" award:

Desidedididawn
Jazz

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Celebrity names impersonated

I thought I'd change it up a little today.

I was thinking today about why artists, singers, actors etc. change their names.

Answer: Because somehow 50 Cent sounds so much better than Curtis Jackson (*side eye and sarcasm*).

So today I'm going to expose their gubment (yes I said gubment) names. And if the FBI, LAPD, Secret Service, IRS or Arizona State Police (that means YOU DMX) are reading, you didn't get any of this info from me.

Real names of Hip hop and R&B artists:

Ashanti Ashanti Shaquoya Douglas
Busta Rhymes Trevor Tahiem Smith
Chaka Khan Carole Yvette Marie Stevens
Flava Flav William Jonathan Drayton, Jr
Flo Rida Tramar Dillard
The Game Jayceon Terrell Taylor
Juvenile Terius Gray
Lupe Fiasco Wasalu Muhammad Jaco
Plies Algernod Lanier Washington
Remy Ma Reminisce Smith
Vivica Fox Vivica Anjanetta Fox

and the ass backwards award goes to:

Michelle Johnson aka Meshell Ndegeocello

the completely random flashback award goes to: Yourree Dell Harris but you may remember her better as:



Call me now! ROTFL

Friday, January 23, 2009

You KNEW It Was Coming

So last year there was this article on how Barack was about to take a jump as the hot new name for babies...

Click HERE to see the article

And it's not just in the U.S. apparently it's a world wide phenomenon. Thus far I have only come across one Barack, but I suspect when the Social Security name list comes out in May you'll see Malia, Sasha, Michelle and Barack all over it.


Friday, January 16, 2009

In honor of MLK Day and the Inauguration WNTNTB will be on a short hiatus... but I wanted to leave you with this...random abstracts from the class of 09

Kajmir
Koutoura
Casnova
Kevil
Jim'myrriah
Vienna
Pixie
Tuppence
Coleone
Diojanay
Knehemiah


and my new favorite word name...

Salinity

I'm crying on the inside. LOL. Have a great weekend.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

As Seen on QVC

First, if you are looking for a unique name, don't choose Unique. It's ironic, but Unique is not, well, unique...and I think I've used that word/name enough times in 2 sentences. Anywho, aside from that one, I have recently come across a spate of names ending in the letters 'que'

I don't know about you, but adding those letters to what might otherwise be a halfway decent name immediately makes me think of the real imitation knock off jewelry they sell on QVC:



So I guess these would be real imitation children's names?

Zaque
JyUnique
Ebonique
Kajhanique

Dejanique
Mystique
Imunique
Unicque
Unequee
Zonique

Martinique (umm...this is a COUNTRY!)

smh...folks really need to quit

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Creativity at its finest...

Here's my entry for today, but first an important UPDATE: A few entires back I posted up a story concerning a child named Adolph Hitler. Well, it seems young Adolph and his sister Aryan Nation were taken from their parents and put into foster care. Check it out HERE

And now on to today's names... no list-- just a funny name related video I came across on youtube:



I think (and I will have to take liberties with the spellings) it goes

Deonna
Deon Jr
Deonvay
Deontay
Demontay
Deondrus
and My'ana

Whew- falls on the floor in exhaustion

No words. None. ROTFL

Scarred for Life

Why our children are going to be permanently scarred for life...

Exhibit A:

(signs that we are seriously in the middle of a financial crisis.)
Exhibit B:


(either this is a "smush" name that wasn't well thought out or somebody owns stock in Victoria's Secret)
Sigh!

Monday, January 12, 2009

Pimp My Kid

I'm so tired of people naming their kids after cars. When did this become trendy and why can't we hit the brakes. Next thing you know, the kid will have a custom diaper kit complete with spinners on the pacifier...



Plus I get the feeling some of these kids might be named after their place of conception.

Grande Marquis
Titan
Solaris
Cobra
Avalon
Caprice
Elantra
Jetta
Sequoia
Talon
Diamante
Legacy
Stealth
Cougar
Bentley
Denali


and the ubiquitous...

Porsche, Lexus and Mercedes

Friday, January 9, 2009

And we have celeb baby #2 for 2009.

Lisa Bonet (you remember her as Denise Huxtable from the Cosby Show) and her husband Jason Momoa had a baby boy. Now before I comment...he's Hawaiian.

Let's give a warm round of applause and an aloha for:

Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa

If you want to see what it all means check out the article here: Lisa Bonet Welcomes a Baby Boy

I'm going to go do some serious tongue and jaw exercises in the meantime until I can figure out how to pronounce it.

PS. Her other two kids are named Lola and Zoe so why she chose to do that to her son is beyond me. smdh.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Yo Mama (Round 2)

I think I am going to make this a regular feature... yo mama!

Ok the deal is, in most my regular search haunts when you search for baby names they are listed with the names of the mother, father or both depending on the source. That means that sometimes I inadvertantly get 2 or 3 funny names for the list for the price of one. A good majority of the time it's the mothers' names that catch me off guard more than the kids. Mostly because I'm sitting there thinking that in theory these women are between let's say, 17-35 years old, which means they've had 2-3 decades to deal with whatever verbal monstrosity was scribbled onto their birth certificate.

And the funny part is, these are the ones I see most often giving their children the easiest of names. Ah, delicious irony. All I have to say is chile better you than me.


zwani.com myspace graphic comments

Here's a small sample:

Domenitrix
Teawanna
EarleAnna
Patches
Ureka
Infinitee
Lavender
Persia
Starstronnia
Sylver
Rhapsody
Grandeur
Beirut
Turquoise

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Way Down Yonder in Mississippi...

There was an interesting article today on yahoo on how Mississippi has replaced New Mexico and Texas as the state with the highest teen birth rate. Check the story out here: Mississippi has highest teen pregnancy rate

And since I have already "messed with Texas" I thought today I would do an ode to Mississippi.



Now I don't know too much about Mississppi, except how to spell it and what I remember from my un-intentional drive across the entire state about 3 years ago. What I did learn is that maaaaaan can they name 'em down there...sheesh! Not only did I find some babies, but I found some mamas with some hot mess atrocious names. I plan to post those in another "yo mama" blog later in the week.

Catfish and confederate flags aside, here is today's naughty list courtesy of our friends in the Magnolia state:

Takota
Ziquavion
Rush
Malajiah
Chancas
L'Kadryn
Dynastee
Zy'Reonnia
Zandler
Fa'vvon
Tylandric
Kymper
Nuseka

The irony award:

LaJaedan
(sadly adding a prefix just made it more of a mess. Le grand *sigh*)

And the winner of the parents had to be World of Warcraft junkies award:

Aragorn

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Enough Already...

Now a few days ago I posted a blog stating that one of the trends I think should go far far away in 2009 in the whole Jayden/Aiden thing.

Lemme tell you why...

First let me say we have a Jadyn (spelled as such) in my family.

Now, I search for GAT ("good and terrible"...lol) names everyday. And I don't care when the "surveys" say-- on every hosiptal/nursery/birth announcement website I use, in every city, every month of the year I come across at LEAST 5 kids named Jayden. It's turned unisex. It's gotten crazy.
Jada Smith and her son Jayden

Just to show you how overly common it is...it went from being #294 on the Social Security name list in 1999 to #18 in 2007--that effectively should kill it from further consideration.
Now add to that the creative folk who think that just because they spell it "creatively" it's really going to make a difference. [face screwing up into look of bewilderment/confuzzlement]. Um...
Allow me to enlighten you...

Here are some of the various incantations of JAYDEN I have come across:

Jayden
Jaiden
Jaden
Jadyn
Jaaden
Jaydin
Jaidin
Jaydon
Jaidon
Jaidyn
Jai'din
Jai'dyn
Jaydyn
J-din

and...my personal favorite...

Jydyn

Seriously? Can we buy a vowel please?

If I tell you it doesn't make a difference how you spell it, will it make a difference? I suppose not. Ay dios mio, make it stop.

Britany Spears and her son Jayden James

Monday, January 5, 2009

And so it begins...

Well, it could be worse... in my first celebrity baby posting for 2009 Rebecca Romijn and Jerry O'Connell apparently had twin girls named:

Dolly Rebecca Rose and Charlie Tamara Tulip




Ok... not excruciatingly horrid, but what's with the triple naming and the flower references??

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Goodbye 2008

Happy New Year!

Out with the old and in with the new right?

While I am waiting to see what the class of 2009 has in store, here is my unofficial name resolution list.

8 Names/Name Trends That Should Go Out with 2008:

1. Jayden/Aiden and any spelling variation of the the two. Neither one of these names is bad, but if parents think they are being either trendy or original picking either one of these names as soon as their child hits pre-school age they will find they were sorely mistaken.

2. Brooklyn Naming your child after any borough of New York is not a good look. Especially when you've never been, have no affiliation with or live anywhere near NYC. Uggggh!

3. anything ending in 'Asia'- My'asia, Ki-Asia, T'asia, Malaysia-- just ghetto fabulous!

4. names ending in 'ee'- Emilee, Averee, Kailee. I'm sorry, but the double 'e' names always reminds me of some overly amped bubble headed cheerleader/future sorority chick. Like OMG make it stop.

5. random 'Y'- hate this trend with a passion. Why is it so hard to add a vowel somewhere, ANYWHERE? and what's the deal with adding random 'Y's in names that don't need them.

6. dead/aging rock star names- dylan, hendrix, jagger--your child has a better shot as being an accountant, lawyer or a teacher than a rock star, so why burden them with a rock star name. If they really do become rockstars, they'll probably change their names anyway

7. Nevaeh- again, in about 2-4 years you can expect to step into any pre-school or kindergarten class and find about 5-6 little Nevaeh's running around. I'm just waiting to find the kid named Lleh

8. Patience and Honesty. I'm willing to bet they will someday grow up to be strippers or guests on Maury.

Let the weird names begin. Let's see what 2009 has in store...