Maury Moment

So, I'm taking a quick break from a project and watching clips of Maury on YouTube (I LOVE technology) and I come across a paternity test segment (see link) where a girl is testing five men for her two kids...

And I see the child's name flash across the screen...

Inkenjarick

I <3 Maury. That is all.

Told You So...

See...this is why people should THINK before they pick a NAME.


One tenth of parents regret the names they chose for their children

Click link for full story

Worst of 2010

Worst celebrity baby names of 2010 (via babycenter.com)

Buddy Bear Maurice (Jamie Oliver & Juliette Norton)
Egypt Daoud (Alicia Keys & Kaseem Dean)
Cosima (Claudia Schiffer & Matthew Vaughn)
Axel (Will Ferrell & Viveca Paulin)
Krishna (Padma Lakshmi)
Gideon Scott (Neil Patrick Harris & David Burtka)
Billie Beatrice (Eric Dane & Rebecca Gayheart)
Abel James (Amy Poehler & Will Arnett)
Vida (Matthew McConaughey & Camila Alves)
Nelson (Céline Dion & René Angélil)

What's Next? Cinnamon Roll?

Pulled from a friend of mine's Facebook status:

"WOW...just met a lady that actually named her baby Bunbun. She said she named him that because he was cute at birth."

Epic FAIL. Parenting license REVOKED.

Denial is not just a river in...

So Alicia Keys and Swizz beats had a boy.

His name according to usweekly.com is:

Egypy Daoud Dean

*crickets*

No comment

Who Knew...

Via Yahoo!

A little video about most common first names (i.e. breakers of the Wonder Bread Rule).

There's an interesting little tidbit about last names too.

Who Knew: Most Common First Names

I Can't Take You Seriously When Your Name Makes Me Hungry

Dang it Steve Harvey... (gonna try and see if I can get audio for this, but probably not until tomorrow).

Heard on the radio this morning via the Steve Harvey morning show:

A girl calls in to comment on a regular segment they have called "Strawberry Letter"

Steve: What's your name?
Girl: Cinnamon.
[the hosts start laughing...and they can tell the jokes are coming]
Steve: Is that your real name?
Girl: Yes.
Steve: Where're you from. You from the country ain't you?
[the girl laughs and confirms she's from somewhere in Kentucky. The other hosts are trying not to laugh and the girl says something to the effect of "I've heard all the jokes" and not to mention she is a psychiatrist]
Steve: That had to be a country name. Ain't no city folks 'fin to name their kid Cinnamon. He 'gon rise to the top let's name hom Baking Powder. She's so sweet, let's name her Condensed Milk.

[at which point I started laughing so hard I nearly spit my coffee out]

Smh. And I thought about this... (catch the reference at 2:26. ROTFL)

March Madness 2010

Ok... as you can guess I am a college basketball fan. Doesn't hurt that my alma mater is currently ranked #1 (that would be SYRACUSE. Go Orange!)

So in honor... This is the WNTNYB Sweet 16 edition. I've picked 16 of the best of the worst--baby names that is--from the cities where the top four ranked schools are (that would be Syracuse, Duke, Kansas and Kentucky). In this year's brackets we have:

Exevione
Alpha
Monyea
Bless Stariah
A'Miracle (aren't they ALL?)
Broox
Lamaj (which is Jamal spelled backwards)
Duanelee
Kuaitt
Moxy
Mercaidiez
Bron-Zeir
M'nyii (I am still at a loss as to how to pronounce this)
Huyland
Na'jhmiere
Mirak (which is Karim spelled backwards--I have my secret theory about this and the other one...they're twins btw, but I'll leave you to your own thoughts here)

Coach calls for a time out...lol

Really?

I had to laugh this morning.

Stuck in traffic I found myself flipping radio stations and landed on the Rickey Smiley morning show. I'm not usually a huge fun, but every week they do a segment called "Paternity Test Tuesdays," where they have a couple in the studio live to find out the results of a paternity test.

Today...

Today...smh

Today... they had a couple who were getting a paternity test for their 17 year old (???--yeah 17 ??? why now??? I don't know).

Well the mother's name was Beth. The father's name was Sam. And the girl's name...

Boquisha

[insert scooby doo noise here]

I thought I had misheard this, but the hosts started snickering...and then one of them asked first for the parents to spell it...and then if the name had any special significance.

Dad's answer: "well I was a big fan of Bo Jackson, so we just ran with it"

*head smack*

aaaaaaaaand I'm done.

PS. She wasn't his daughter

All the Cool Kids Are Doing It...

The gurus of baby names are Satran & Rosenkrantz. They've written 10 books and collected thousands of names. Every so often I see them cited in baby name blogs hyping the latest in name trends.
...
Just today as I was scanning, I came across their list of "cool" baby names.

Um...Perhaps I missed the memo, but if this is what constitues "cool" ...

Well, [insert look of complete confuzzlement] I won't commentary I'll just let you decide. Here's a small sample of names that made their "cool" list:

Zinc
Romola
Cayenne
Henna
Currier
Phynley
Primus
Feather
Azuba
Beech
Prairie
Fyodor
Banjo
Huckleberry
Quadeisha
Tulsa
Picabia
Remember
Amsterdam
Django

I'll be over at the nerd table if anyone needs me.

Announcement

WNTNYB was on summer hiatus while I stacked up on new names and did some work...more horrible names to come. I promise. ;)

WNTNTB- Friday the 13th Edition

Welcome to the Friday the 13th Edition of what NOT to Name Your Baby.



Usually it's a great day for me...not so lucky for the people walking around with names like:

Lucky Day
Thirteen Foster
Friday Anderson
Talisman T. Hawkins
Tarot Peterson

I've also recently come across kids named:

Clover
Star
Mystic
Trinity
Penny
Amulet

And just in case you ever wondered how they could keep making Friday the 13th movies... the real Jason Voorhees lives the states of CA, KS, NC, PA, WV, FL, KY and OH

Creativity at its finest...

Here's my entry for today, but first an important UPDATE: A few entires back I posted up a story concerning a child named Adolph Hitler. Well, it seems young Adolph and his sister Aryan Nation were taken from their parents and put into foster care. Check it out HERE

And now on to today's names... no list-- just a funny name related video I came across on youtube:



I think (and I will have to take liberties with the spellings) it goes

Deonna
Deon Jr
Deonvay
Deontay
Demontay
Deondrus
and My'ana

Whew- falls on the floor in exhaustion

No words. None. ROTFL

Scarred for Life

Why our children are going to be permanently scarred for life...

Exhibit A:

(signs that we are seriously in the middle of a financial crisis.)

Exhibit B:

(either this is a "smush" name that wasn't well thought out or somebody owns stock in Victoria's Secret)

Sigh!

Pimp My Kid

I'm so tired of people naming their kids after cars. When did this become trendy and why can't we hit the brakes. Next thing you know, the kid will have a custom diaper kit complete with spinners on the pacifier...



Plus I get the feeling some of these kids might be named after their place of conception.

Grande Marquis
Titan
Solaris
Cobra
Avalon
Caprice
Elantra
Jetta
Sequoia
Talon
Diamante
Legacy
Stealth
Cougar
Bentley
Denali

and the ubiquitous...

Porsche, Lexus and Mercedes

And we have celeb baby #2 for 2009.

Lisa Bonet (you remember her as Denise Huxtable from the Cosby Show) and her husband Jason Momoa had a baby boy. Now before I comment...he's Hawaiian.

Let's give a warm round of applause and an aloha for:

Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa

If you want to see what it all means check out the article here: Lisa Bonet Welcomes a Baby Boy

I'm going to go do some serious tongue and jaw exercises in the meantime until I can figure out how to pronounce it.

PS. Her other two kids are named Lola and Zoe so why she chose to do that to her son is beyond me. smdh.

Way Down Yonder in Mississippi...

There was an interesting article today on yahoo on how Mississippi has replaced New Mexico and Texas as the state with the highest teen birth rate. Check the story out here: Mississippi has highest teen pregnancy rate

And since I have already "messed with Texas" I thought today I would do an ode to Mississippi.



Now I don't know too much about Mississppi, except how to spell it and what I remember from my un-intentional drive across the entire state about 3 years ago. What I did learn is that maaaaaan can they name 'em down there...sheesh! Not only did I find some babies, but I found some mamas with some hot mess atrocious names. I plan to post those in another "yo mama" blog later in the week.

Catfish and confederate flags aside, here is today's naughty list courtesy of our friends in the Magnolia state:

Takota
Ziquavion
Rush
Malajiah
Chancas
L'Kadryn
Dynastee
Zy'Reonnia
Zandler
Fa'vvon
Tylandric
Kymper
Nuseka

The irony award:

LaJaedan
(sadly adding a prefix just made it more of a mess. Le grand *sigh*)

And the winner of the parents had to be World of Warcraft junkies award:

Aragorn

Enough Already...

Now a few days ago I posted a blog stating that one of the trends I think should go far far away in 2009 in the whole Jayden/Aiden thing.

Lemme tell you why...

First let me say we have a Jadyn (spelled as such) in my family.

Now, I search for GAT ("good and terrible"...lol) names everyday. And I don't care when the "surveys" say-- on every hosiptal/nursery/birth announcement website I use, in every city, every month of the year I come across at LEAST 5 kids named Jayden. It's turned unisex. It's gotten crazy.

Jada Smith and her son Jayden

Just to show you how overly common it is...it went from being #294 on the Social Security name list in 1999 to #18 in 2007--that effectively should kill it from further consideration.

Now add to that the creative folk who think that just because they spell it "creatively" it's really going to make a difference. [face screwing up into look of bewilderment/confuzzlement]. Um...

Allow me to enlighten you...

Here are some of the various incantations of JAYDEN I have come across:

Jayden
Jaiden
Jaden
Jadyn
Jaaden
Jaydin
Jaidin
Jaydon
Jaidon
Jaidyn
Jai'din
Jai'dyn
Jaydyn
J-din

and...my personal favorite...

Jydyn

Seriously? Can we buy a vowel please?

If I tell you it doesn't make a difference how you spell it, will it make a difference? I suppose not. Ay dios mio, make it stop.

Britany Spears and her son Jayden James

Goodbye 2008

Happy New Year!

Out with the old and in with the new right?

While I am waiting to see what the class of 2009 has in store, here is my unofficial name resolution list.

8 Names/Name Trends That Should Go Out with 2008:

1. Jayden/Aiden and any spelling variation of the the two. Neither one of these names is bad, but if parents think they are being either trendy or original picking either one of these names as soon as their child hits pre-school age they will find they were sorely mistaken.

2. Brooklyn Naming your child after any borough of New York is not a good look. Especially when you've never been, have no affiliation with or live anywhere near NYC. Uggggh!

3. anything ending in 'Asia'- My'asia, Ki-Asia, T'asia, Malaysia-- just ghetto fabulous!

4. names ending in 'ee'- Emilee, Averee, Kailee. I'm sorry, but the double 'e' names always reminds me of some overly amped bubble headed cheerleader/future sorority chick. Like OMG make it stop.

5. random 'Y'- hate this trend with a passion. Why is it so hard to add a vowel somewhere, ANYWHERE? and what's the deal with adding random 'Y's in names that don't need them.

6. dead/aging rock star names- dylan, hendrix, jagger--your child has a better shot as being an accountant, lawyer or a teacher than a rock star, so why burden them with a rock star name. If they really do become rockstars, they'll probably change their names anyway

7. Nevaeh- again, in about 2-4 years you can expect to step into any pre-school or kindergarten class and find about 5-6 little Nevaeh's running around. I'm just waiting to find the kid named Lleh

8. Patience and Honesty. I'm willing to bet they will someday grow up to be strippers or guests on Maury.

Let the weird names begin. Let's see what 2009 has in store...

And how exactly do you sign the cards....

WNTNTB will be on hiatus until the new year. New names will be stacked in the arsenal and ready to kick off 2009. Until then here are some of my favorite recent "weird name" articles.

Swedish couple fights to name their baby Metallica
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,263700,00.html

Judge makes child a ward of the court to change her name from Talula Does the Hula From Hawaii
http://www.usatoday.com/news/offbeat/2008-07-24-New-Zealand_N.htm

The real Dow and Indiana Jones
http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/08/01/unusual.names.irpt/index.html

And then... the child with 25 middle names
http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article.html?in_article_id=147326&in_page_id=34